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But — astead herndon You don’t really talk — you don’t really talk about that on the first date? I don’t know how to — I don’t know if that’s the best way to phrase it. I just — they’re not for me if they’re really, really intense about it. And it is really, really important to some people and less important to others. speaker 8 I’m — I’m — I’m more pro-choice, to be honest.

Persons: ashley I’m Ashley, radia I’m Radia, ashley, astead herndon, ashley Yes, radia, we’re, we’ve, hasn’t, Donald Trump, it’s Donald Trump, Joe Biden, ashley Um, BELL, herndon, Elisa Gutierrez, Ashley, Radia, King of Prussia, elisa gutierrez, elisa gutierrez Oh, elisa gutierrez We’re, Don’t, I’m Astead Herndon, Trump, there’s, you’re, — astead herndon, Biden, It’s, that’s, I’m, COVID, didn’t —, aren’t, I’m John, astead, wasn’t, karen, Karen, karen Um, don’t, they’re, — astead, —, Pew, jess grose, Jess Grose, ” astead herndon, anna martin I’m Anna Martin, Elisa, anna martin, Jess, you’ve, astead herndon We’re, Anna, Taylor Swift, anna martin That’s, anna martin You’re, I’ve, anna martin Totally, jess grose Homophily, astead herndon Homophily, astead herndon I’m, — jess grose That’s, it’s, you’ll, anna martin Absolutely, jess grose Yes, anna martin Oh, Wariness, astead herndon Anna, anna martin Good, jess grose Oh, Jessica Grose, Anna Martin, Tom Suozzi, Republican Mazi Pilip, astead herndon He’ll, George Santos, astead herndon Donald Trump, Lara Trump, Sean Hannity, lara, Donald J, Ronna McDaniel, biden, Jason Kelce, Travis Kelce, Mama Kelce Organizations: The New York Times, Biden, Trump, Pew, “ Times, Democratic, Republican Party, Republican, The Boston Globe, Nassau, Nassau County Republican, Republican National Committee, RNC, South, GOP Locations: King, Philadelphia, herndon, astead herndon, It’s, United States, —, Boston, New, Nassau County, Israel

☆ Opinion | When It Comes to Dating, Ambition Might Matter More Than Politics
▼ + stars: | 2024-02-07 | by ( Jessica Grose | ) www.nytimes.com time to read: +2 min

I read through all 274 responses to a questionnaire I put out about how politics affects the dating lives of Americans under 30, and I took note of the fact that quite a few respondents used economic terminology when describing their romantic experiences. The term “scarcity,” in particular, came up more than once as a factor in dating experiences. If you live in a smaller or more politically mixed environment, you can’t afford to be so choosy without severely restricting your dating pool. In Brooklyn, for example, registered Democrats outnumber registered Republicans about eight to one. So for daters in my own liberal bubble, it doesn’t matter nearly as much that in the country overall, men are more likely to be conservative — a New Yorker is unlikely to be dating someone who currently lives in Alabama or Wyoming.

Persons: doesn’t, “ It’s, ” Organizations: Democrat Locations: New York, Denver, Brooklyn, New, Alabama, Wyoming

☆ Opinion | Are These Recipes Good, or Is the TikTok Chef Just Good-Looking?
▼ + stars: | 2024-02-03 | by ( Jessica Grose | ) www.nytimes.com time to read: +1 min

I follow a lot of cooking accounts on TikTok and Instagram, which means that I get served ever more cooking content, and over the past few years, I’ve noticed a stylistic change. But lately, more and more of the cooking video creators appear as their full selves, and most of them are blandly attractive. I don’t know about you, but I don’t need a chef to tell me that a ham and cheese sandwich tastes good. It’s reached the point where I can’t tell: Are these recipes good, or are the people leading me through them just good-looking in a way that’s rewarded by social media algorithms? But it made me wonder whether the “beauty premium” — something that economists have observed over many years — is greater now that individuals with all different levels of expertise can get a career boost from having a robust social media presence.

Persons: I’ve, BuzzFeed’s, speck, burrata, It’s, ”, Vox’s Rebecca Jennings, “

☆ Opinion | Good Marriages Are Good. Bad Marriages Are, Well, Bad.
▼ + stars: | 2024-01-31 | by ( Jessica Grose | ) www.nytimes.com time to read: +3 min

There’s an idea that’s been floating around for a few years that when it comes to marriage, wealthy elites hold luxury beliefs. And she said: “I’ll probably end up getting married, having a husband and have that kind of conventional family life. He said that this kind of elite belief expressed by his classmate had a trickle-down negative cultural influence. Bowling Green State University’s National Center for Family and Marriage Research has tracked high school seniors’ attitudes toward marriage since the 1970s. Considering how cynical Gen Z is about most major societal institutions, it’s remarkable how pro-marriage they are.

Persons: Rob Henderson —, Yascha Mounk, Henderson, she’s, “, ” Henderson Organizations: Yale, Bowling Green State University’s National, for Family, Research

☆ Opinion | In a Post-Roe World, Are Differing Views on Abortion a Dating Deal-breaker?
▼ + stars: | 2024-01-24 | by ( Jessica Grose | ) www.nytimes.com time to read: +1 min

A few weeks ago, when I asked Times readers under 30 how politics influences their dating lives, I expected that the subject of reproductive choice would come up pretty frequently. Among the more than 200 people who sent email responses to my questionnaire, I got a lot of answers like this one from a 25-year-old New Yorker named Nicole, who described herself as very liberal: “Anti-abortion is my biggest political deal-breaker. I also talked to Nathan Miller, 23, of Dayton, Ohio, who described himself as very conservative. He told me that abortion is a deeply personal issue for him, because he’s Catholic. If they were using dating apps, they said, they would often filter for political beliefs so people from the opposing party wouldn’t even show up in their feeds.

Persons: Roe, Wade, Nicole, Nathan Miller, Nathan Locations: Dayton , Ohio

☆ Opinion | Debating the Value of Standardized Tests
▼ + stars: | 2024-01-23 | by ( ) www.nytimes.com time to read: +1 min

To the Editor:Re “Don’t Ditch Standardized Tests. It takes about five minutes in a school building to know if it needs more resources. And yet, regardless of the ever-changing policy on standardized tests, the same schools across our nation suffer from underfunding year after year. To the Editor:Jessica Grose doesn’t mention a standardized testing organization that many school districts around the nation use. NWEA, Northwest Evaluation Association, is a nonprofit organization that provides standardized tests in reading, math, language usage and science.

Persons: Jessica Grose, Grose, I’ve, Jeremy Glazer Glassboro, Jessica Grose doesn’t Organizations: Rowan University, Evaluation Association Locations: N.J, NWEA

☆ Opinion | Don’t Ditch Standardized Tests. Fix Them.
▼ + stars: | 2024-01-17 | by ( Jessica Grose | ) www.nytimes.com time to read: +1 min

According to The New York Post’s analysis of New York State Education Department data, “Nearly 200,000 students — or one out of five — refused to sit for the state’s standardized reading and math exams for grades 3-8 administered in the spring” of 2023. That number surprised me. There’s certainly some precedent for it, but I thought that the educational havoc wreaked by the Covid pandemic might have dampened the popularity of the opt-out movement — the tide of parents who’ve chosen to exempt their kids from state standardized testing. Apparently not. I also thought that damning revelations in recent years about “balanced literacy” — a method focused on “developing a love of books and ensuring students understand the meaning of stories,” as the Times education reporter Sarah Mervosh described it — which was shown to be less effective than phonics (“systematic, sound-it-out instruction”), would make parents realize that standardized testing is an important part of developing the best curriculum possible.

Persons: There’s, who’ve, Sarah Mervosh Organizations: The, New York State Education Department Locations: The New York

☆ Opinion | Snowplow Parents Are Ruining Online Grading
▼ + stars: | 2023-11-29 | by ( Jessica Grose | ) www.nytimes.com time to read: +2 min

During the 2011-12 school year, Roxanne Greitz Miller was a professor-in-residence at a California middle school that had just implemented an online grade book that allowed parents and students to see students’ grades as soon as they were posted to an app. I recently spoke to Miller, who is now the dean of the College of Educational Studies at Chapman University, and she said it was clear to her almost immediately that this technology was “game changing” for parents, teachers and students — and not in a good way. Mitch Foss, who was a classroom teacher in Colorado for 19 years, told me that when he posted grades, he would hear from kids almost instantly via email or text. Sometimes they’d be waiting outside his classroom door to talk about their scores. “You might get emails from parents questioning the grade, wanting an explanation, and that’s for every single thing,” even assignments that had little bearing on students’ overall marks, “which can be overwhelming.”

Persons: Roxanne Greitz Miller, Miller, —, “ I’ll, ‘, it’s, ”, I’ve, Mitch Foss, they’d, “ Organizations: College of Educational, Chapman University Locations: California, Colorado

☆ Opinion | Americans Under 30 Don’t Trust Religion — or Anything Else
▼ + stars: | 2023-11-25 | by ( Jessica Grose | ) www.nytimes.com time to read: +2 min

Whereas with many young Americans, Burge said, “they look at all the religion options and say, ‘I really don’t want to pick a side.’ And that’s what nothing in particular is. So it makes a certain kind of sense that they don’t want to associate too closely with any defined group. What’s more, some religious institutions have had high-profile ethical failures around cases of sexual abuse — concealing rather than confronting allegations of wrongdoing among their leadership. “Instead of trying to redress these really incredibly painful problems, they made things worse in many instances,” Cox said. “So I think that’s a really different environment to come of age and to learn about how these institutions operate and who they operate for.”

Persons: Burge, It’s, it’s, we’ve, —, Clinton, Trump, Daniel Cox, ” That’s, ” Cox, ” Organizations: Survey Center, American Enterprise Institute

☆ Opinion | Congress Isn’t a Schoolyard. Time to Deal With Toxic Immaturity.
▼ + stars: | 2023-11-18 | by ( Jessica Grose | ) www.nytimes.com time to read: +2 min

The set-to between Mullin and O’Brien wasn’t the only incident of its kind in Congress this week. And though it may go without saying, what’s good for the basest kind of political entertainment isn’t necessarily good for Congress, the country as a whole or young men. I don’t have boys, but I know that by several measures, they are floundering compared to American girls. I don’t mean that in a “Won’t somebody please think of the children” kind of way. I just don’t think we can be a functional society if this becomes the new norm.

Persons: Joseph Bernstein, Mark Zuckerberg, Elon Musk, it’s “, Mullin, O’Brien, Robert Jimison, Donald Trump, Gen, ” Sanders, Let’s, It’s, “ Organizations: Pew Research, Congress Locations: ”, United States

☆ Opinion | Are We Finally Ready for a Male Contraceptive?
▼ + stars: | 2023-11-08 | by ( Jessica Grose | ) www.nytimes.com time to read: +3 min

So the method the foundation is working on with a biotech company is a pill that needs to be taken only monthly. It contains the same types of hormones that are in a daily pill, so the same set of side effects would apply. Another hot spot for innovation is in injectables, like the Depo-Provera shot, Vogelsong said. ”Injectables aren’t very popular in the U.S., but they are the No. 1 method used in many countries in sub-Saharan Africa for a variety of reasons,” she noted.

Persons: Ed Cara, ”, Wang, Kirsten Vogelsong, Melinda Gates, Vogelsong, I’ve Organizations: Melinda Gates Foundation Locations: injectables, U.S, Saharan Africa

☆ Opinion | The Despair at the Heart of Britney Spears’s Memoir
▼ + stars: | 2023-11-04 | by ( Jessica Grose | ) www.nytimes.com time to read: +1 min

The first chapter of Britney Spears’s new memoir, “The Woman in Me,” includes the story of her paternal grandmother, Emma Jean Spears, called Jean; everybody says Britney Spears looks like her, but that’s not the only thing they have in common. “Tragedy runs in my family,” the passage about Jean Spears begins. “Jean wasn’t the only wife June sent to the mental hospital in Mandeville,” Britney Spears writes. “He sent his second wife there, too.”That’s the environment that her father, Jamie Spears, was raised in, Britney Spears writes. By now, most people have heard about her conservatorship (the subject of a Times documentary, “Framing Britney Spears”), which started in 2008, after her father petitioned for control over his daughter’s life and finances, citing concerns about her mental health.

Persons: Britney Spears’s, Emma Jean Spears, Jean, Britney Spears, that’s, Jean Spears, June Spears, “ Jean wasn’t, “, ”, Jamie Spears, Justin Timberlake Organizations: Louisiana Hospital Locations: Mandeville

☆ Opinion | Why We Need to Talk More Openly About Birth Control Side Effects
▼ + stars: | 2023-11-01 | by ( Jessica Grose | ) www.nytimes.com time to read: +3 min

Part of the reason that some non-hormonal birth control methods seem to have gained such traction on social media is that there is a tendency among some medical professionals to downplay the side effects of hormonal birth control methods that many women experience. Most women who use birth control are completely or somewhat satisfied with their methods of choice, but a minority of them experience reactions unpleasant enough to seriously impede their daily lives. Over the years, I have heard anecdotally about — and experienced — various side effects to different types of contraception: heavy breakthrough bleeding and abdominal pain with IUDs, mood disturbances with different types of pills, and sexual side effects with everything. Discussion of these issues, often confined to intimate chats among women, was aired out in a great extended bit from the comedian Beth Stelling’s new Netflix special, in which she recounts the various kinds of birth control she’s “experimented recreationally” with over the years. But some physicians say without data that point to the prevalence of some side effects, they find it difficult to respond.

Persons: Beth Stelling’s, she’s “, ”, “, Sara Cravatts, Cravatts, —, Kat Tenbarge, Kate White, they’re Organizations: Netflix, “, Stat, NBC News, Boston Medical Center

She comes on Halloween night after they fall asleep, switch it out for either healthier candy or a toy. But I think it’s all part of a larger trend where we don’t let kids have time or space to let their imaginations run wild. And so this lack of unconstructed free time is making kids feel that they don’t have power in their own lives. Maybe a little, but I’m not —[LAUGHS]I don’t want — like, I don’t do it just to be a hater. And where can I find ways that we can do things that give our kids more freedom and pleasure that we’re not stage managing?

Persons: I’m Jessica Grose, I’m, You’re Organizations: The New York Times, Pediatrics

☆ Opinion | Stop Micromanaging Halloween — Let Your Kids Be Free
▼ + stars: | 2023-10-25 | by ( Jessica Grose | ) www.nytimes.com time to read: +3 min

Yes, there’s international variation on these themes, which I’ve written about, and the authors of the commentary cite Finland, in particular, as a place where children still have a lot of autonomy. They theorize that a lack of independent activities negatively affects a child’s internal locus of control. When children aren’t allowed to do things on their own, they may have a weaker internal LOC, and that is “highly predictive” of certain levels of anxiety and depression. Which is that you’re taking away the opportunity for kids to have control over what they’re doing, “Because you are always controlling them. But one reason parents are overcontrolling is that they are worried about things like crime, bullying, inappropriate internet content and so on, and these things have their own negative effect on kids.

Persons: —, aren’t, ”, Peter Gray, They’re, ” Laurence Steinberg, “ Organizations: Boston College, Temple University Locations: Finland, United States

☆ Opinion | Lenient Grading Won’t Help Struggling Students. Addressing Chronic Absenteeism Will.
▼ + stars: | 2023-10-18 | by ( Jessica Grose | ) www.nytimes.com time to read: +3 min

Once put in place, though, these types of changes are difficult to roll back, said Paul Hill, the founder of the Center on Reinventing Public Education. Schools don’t work like businesses — beta testing a particular practice, looking at the results and moving forward based on the outcome. Instead, these types of realignments can become the status quo, regardless of what the data says, according to Hill. After my previous story, I did hear from some educators who’ve had positive experiences applying the 50 percent floor. But that doesn’t change the reality that strong evidence is lacking that such a practice is academically effective on a large scale.

Persons: Paul Hill, hadn’t, Brian Conrad, who’ve, you’ve, that’s, ” Organizations: Reinventing Public Education, Schools, San Francisco Unified School District, Stanford, University of Pennsylvania, University of Texas, North Locations: Hill, That’s, California, San Antonio, North Carolina

☆ Opinion | You Can Win in Business Without Being Unhinged
▼ + stars: | 2023-09-27 | by ( Jessica Grose | ) www.nytimes.com time to read: +2 min

I’ve read and watched many stories about the most heralded business leaders of the past few centuries. I’m not immune to the inherent drama of an arrogant rise, a spectacular fall or both. (For example, harassing job interviewees, firing people in front of crowds, attacking former employees of companies they purchased. Isaacson puts innovation first: This man might be a monster, but look at what he built! Whereas Mary Shelley, for instance, put innovation second: The man who built this is a monster!

Persons: I’ve, Walter Isaacson’s, Steve Jobs, Elon Musk, Aaron Sorkin’s, Jobs, Mark Zuckerberg, Jill Lepore, Isaacson’s, Isaacson, Franklin, Einstein, Leonardo da Vinci, Mary Shelley, Marisa Meltzer’s, Emily Weiss’s Glossier, ”, Meltzer, clichés, valorizes Weiss, Weiss, underling, Lauren Conrad, Whitney Port, Hunter Harris Organizations: The Times Locations: ”

☆ Opinion | The Teacher Shortage: Why, and What to Do?
▼ + stars: | 2023-09-26 | by ( ) www.nytimes.com time to read: +1 min

Can You Blame Them?,” by Jessica Grose (newsletter, nytimes.com, Sept. 13):As a retired teacher, I read this with heartfelt interest. Ms. Grose noted the cost of getting a degree, low pay and lack of respect as leading causes for our current shortage of teachers. Then again, when I entered the College of Education at the University of Minnesota in 1980, my friends thought I was crazy. The classroom felt like a journey of love, an opportunity to be inspired and to inspire each and every day. I walked into my college guidance counselor’s office and asked to transfer into the College of Education.

Persons: Jessica Grose, Grose Organizations: College of Education, University of Minnesota

☆ Opinion | The Joys of Spite Exercising
▼ + stars: | 2023-09-23 | by ( Jessica Grose | ) www.nytimes.com time to read: +3 min

I like to joke that my current fitness level has been achieved through spite. After I had kids, I also resented any notion that I couldn’t possibly attain the fitness level I had before pushing out two nine-pound monsters. I wanted to understand, on a deeper level, why I found this spite exercising so satisfying, beyond the oft-reported mood-enhancing benefits of running. In “Secrets of Giants,” Ages writes:I couldn’t explain it, but going to the gym was bringing me back to life. block, I have a little mantra that I repeat in my head: You can do anything for five minutes.

Persons: nebbishes, —, I’d, ”, “, I’m Organizations: Giants

☆ Opinion | The Hope at the Bottom of the ‘Child Care Cliff’
▼ + stars: | 2023-09-20 | by ( Jessica Grose | ) www.nytimes.com time to read: +2 min

So I called Kathryn Anne Edwards, an economist and economic policy consultant, to see if there’s an argument that might change people’s minds about the utter necessity of more robust government child care funding — or if I should lose all hope in the possibility of a shift in the way that child care is thought about, discussed and sustained in the United States. labor force participation is midway through a historic decline. In Edwards’s phrasing, it “has been frozen in time for 25 years.” When you see headlines about how we’re at all-time highs for women’s labor force participation, Edwards suggests, that’s misleading. When you look at the actual level of increase since the 1990s, labor force participation among women has barely budged, and without a policy shift, we shouldn’t expect it to go up much in the coming years. The second thing that could force Congress to act on child care is that the birthrate is on the decline in the United States, Edwards said.

Persons: Kathryn Anne Edwards, Edwards, ”, ” Edwards, “, Peter G Organizations: Social, Peterson Foundation, Social Security Locations: United States

☆ Opinion | There’s Still Overwhelming Cultural Pressure to Get Married and Have Kids
▼ + stars: | 2023-09-16 | by ( Jessica Grose | ) www.nytimes.com time to read: +3 min

Personally, I don’t care whether candidates for higher office are married — I don’t think it has anything to do with their ability to lead. (Even Donald Trump, with his divorces and reputation as a womanizer, could be photographed with his beautiful current wife and brood of kids.) And on the other: People Without Kids (PWOKS: self-absorbed, entitled, attention whores, grumpy about life’s inconveniences even though their life is easy). I read this piece on two levels, the cultural and the personal. As for the cultural, I think when people get into their 30s and 40s and aren’t married and don’t have kids, they’re often judged in the “Departed” style.

Persons: Martin Scorsese, he’s, ”, “, Tim Scott, —, won’t, Donald Trump, Allison P, Davis, aren’t, don’t, they’re, it’s Organizations: Washington Post, Republican, White House Locations: United States

☆ Opinion | No One Wants to Be a Teacher Anymore. Can You Blame Them?
▼ + stars: | 2023-09-13 | by ( Jessica Grose | ) www.nytimes.com time to read: +4 min

Interest in the teaching profession among high school seniors and college freshman has fallen 50 percent since the 1990s and 38 percent since 2010, reaching the lowest level in the last 50 years. It’s important to note that teacher shortages are not uniformly spread across schools, districts or states. So what can be done to help get more teachers into the profession and keep them there? Cutting the costs of a teaching degree is one lever to pull, whether that’s through student loan forgiveness or college scholarships. reported that when adjusted for inflation, “the average salary of teachers has actually declined by an estimated 6.4 percent, or $3,644, over the past decade.”

Persons: Matthew Kraft of Brown, Melissa Arnold Lyon, Kraft, Dorinda Carter Andrews, “, ” Carter Andrews, M.S.U, ” Organizations: Annenberg Institute, School Reform, Brown University, University, Albany, Michigan State University, National Education Association Locations: Colorado, Washington State

☆ Opinion | I’m Not a Joiner. Was I Born That Way?
▼ + stars: | 2023-09-09 | by ( Jessica Grose | ) www.nytimes.com time to read: +2 min

When I started my reporting, I was somewhat ambivalent about my lack of traditional observance as an adult. I went to temple growing up and I’m proud of my heritage and the values I consider to be Jewish. There are a lot of reasons for this reaction, but the most deep-rooted may be that I’m not a joiner. I’m often skeptical of institutions, their exclusionary tactics and their hidden agendas, which makes me a good journalist (and arguably a good Jew, because we love to question everything). Once a book becomes an assignment, reading it starts feeling like a chore, rather than a pleasure.

Persons: I’ve, Groucho Marx, I’m

☆ Opinion | The Fight for Your Kids’ Brains Has Already Begun
▼ + stars: | 2023-09-06 | by ( Jessica Grose | ) www.nytimes.com time to read: +2 min

Much of the drama in the charming new Netflix teen comedy “You Are So Not Invited to My Bat Mitzvah” revolves around the pitfalls of social media, specifically the public sharing of private videos. A mild spoiler: Stacy completes the jump without injury and to great applause, until her maxi pad floats up next to her and the applause dissolves into laughter. A humiliation like this used to be confined to the memory of the kids who witnessed it, and at worst, it became local lore. They’re 10 and 7 and I don’t allow them to use social media yet, and I feel some comfort having equipped them with as much information as I can about the digital world. I’m not naïve and I don’t think they’re perfect angels — I know they’ll make mistakes, but hopefully they have enough foresight and knowledge that their errors aren’t catastrophic ones.

Persons: Stacy, I’ve, Devorah Heitner, Heitner Organizations: Netflix, ricochet, Northwestern University

☆ Opinion | Where Should Agnostics Go on Sundays?
▼ + stars: | 2023-09-01 | by ( Ross Douthat | ) www.nytimes.com time to read: +5 min

So what he’d like — well, here’s the quote:I can easily imagine a “church for the nones.” (It would need a more appealing name.) I could attend a Christian church on Sundays and teach my daughter about other beliefs the rest of the week. With all my reservations, I don’t really want to join an existing church. And I don’t think I am going to have much luck getting my fellow nones to join something I start. My sense is that the people who want what church provides are going to the existing Christian churches, even if they are skeptical of some of the beliefs.

Persons: Perry Bacon, ’, Jessica Grose, Nick Kristof, Bacon, certainties, Doesn’t Bacon, Hasn’t, he’s, I’ve Organizations: The Washington Post, Society for Ethical, Netflix Locations: America, ”

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