“Red, White & Royal Blue” waits just seven and a half minutes to get to the good stuff, and by that I’m not referring to the movie’s big romance, between a hot British prince and the hot son of the American president, but to its even bigger accent, a syrupy Southern drawl from Uma Thurman that may be this season’s most audacious special effect.
Imagine Gina Gershon in “Showgirls” crossed with Ross Perot and you’ll get halfway there — the rest of the distance must be traveled holding a mint julep that’s in constant, delicious danger of spilling.
President Uma Thurman (the actual character name is incidental, since you will never not be thinking “President Uma Thurman” when she’s onscreen) is introduced accent-first, with her back to the camera, because encountering this voice head-on would surely be too much for the unprepared Prime Video viewers who stumbled upon the movie after bingeing “Bosch.” We meet her as she’s busy lecturing her hot son about his initial clash with the hot prince.
“Darlin’,” President Uma Thurman says, “yew’ve dun some pretty stupid things in yur day, buh this …”To say my ears perked up is an understatement: It was as though Arianna Huffington had appeared before me reciting a monologue from “True Blood.” This is not an accent you should attempt while operating heavy machinery, but Thurman ladles it on so thick that you have to admire the movie-star chutzpah.
I even started to miss her whenever “Red, White & Royal Blue” cut back to the hot boys’ romantic misadventures: Why are we spending time on these tedious hunks when the most suspenseful thing about the movie is how President Uma Thurman will pronounce any given word?
Persons:
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