ODD, ABSURD, CUCKOO-BANANAS—all apt descriptors for recent evening-bag trends. Over the past few years, popular styles have included Lilliputian options too tiny to hold a smartphone; flashy, crystal-drenched satchels that cost four months’ rent; and novelty shapes such as coffee cups and pigeons (see below). Viral though they may be, such bags seem more suited to 20-something TikTok stars than grown-up women who need a sleek-looking clutch for their next dinner party. Such fashionable adults have been left asking, “Where have all the chic, practical, unsilly evening bags gone?”

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