This story is available exclusively to Business Insider subscribers. It made her feel "dumb" and "grimy," she told Business Insider. McCabe wrote about the doomed affair in her part-memoir, part-self-help guide, "The Red Flags I've (Repeatedly) Ignored, Love, Lust, and Lessons." "It should have been a deal breaker because I wanted a committed monogamous relationship," McCabe said. "He texted to say, 'I'm thinking about you, I had a dream about you, and I don't want to do this. "

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