As a social psychologist, couples counselor and relationship expert, I've spent over 20 years working with thousands of individuals and couples.
I've found that it's usually these daily tasks, and each partner's perception of fairness, that ultimately causes a lot of conflict.
Be realistic about your list and talk about the resources you each need.
Over time, a lot of things become automatic and some tasks only have to be discussed when there's a change.
Make a list you can refer back to and adjustCreate a list that's visible to you both, like a shared online calendar with different color coding.
Persons:
I've, Pejman, Sara Nasserzadeh
Organizations:
Wednesday, NPR, BBC, CNN, USA, CNBC